 'Tis the season for holiday gatherings....and maybe increased stress, too? The holiday season can feel like a stressful time for many managing food allergy and allergic conditions. The safe food preparation and planning. The logistics of ensuring your child doesn't eat foods that aren't safe. The potentially not-so-supportive and stressful conversations with family members who just don't get it? My hope is that all of you have incredibly supportive and understanding families, who are willing to make safe adjustments to recipes and navigate inclusion without skipping a beat! But the reality is that even in supportive families, there still may be tough conversations about the management of food allergies and allergic conditions. Therefore, here are practical tips for navigating (3) tense allergy-related discussions at (or while preparing for) holiday family gatherings:  "Can't you (or your child) just have a little bite? I'm sure it will be fine!" Especially true for older generations, your family members may not be well-versed in IgE-mediated food allergies and allergic conditions if they don't live with them. And while comments like this can be frustrating, it's helpful to remember that in most cases, the comment comes from a place of love. Use these practical approaches to navigate this scenario in a workable way:
 "I recently read about (insert treatment or trial) and that it can cure allergies! Why aren't you doing that?" With so many clickbait headlines circulating online, your well-intentioned family members may ask if you know the latest food allergy news they recently read about. Again, this is most likely coming from a place of love, but it's easy to experience this as judgement on how you're managing your allergy. Additionally, the information they share may not be accurate or understood accurately. Use these practical approaches to navigate this scenario in a workable way:
 Your family, your in-laws, or partner's family just don't get allergies, which causes friction - and the possibility of not attending This may be one of the more likely scenarios people navigate during holiday gatherings. Whatever the specifics are in your situation, it can be frustrating and exhausting to deal with this, especially if this is the experience for every holiday gathering. As referenced in this FAC blog post on this topic, here are practical approaches to navigate this scenario in a workable way:
 Final Thoughts.... Remember that whatever the stressful conversation topics may be, you have choices. You don't have to discuss things you don't want to. You don't have to justify your allergy management protocols. You can choose to kindly, but firmly change topics! Prepare some canned responses before the family gathering, and try your best to stay connected to the reason for the holiday season over the next couple of months! want more empowering allergy life tips like this emailed directly to you? subscribe to receive "food allergy counselor corner" emails! And don't forget about ALL of the FAC resources there to support you!
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As a family therapy-trained licensed therapist, I often find myself wondering about the systems in which we live. The family system, the community system, and beyond. Furthermore, I find it valuable to gain an understanding of how each system works, and how each member feels and navigates their role - especially within the family system. Last year, I shared survey results exploring how non-allergic siblings felt. Recently, I became more curious about how dads perceived their experiences as food allergy parents. So, rather than trying to assume, I decided to go straight to the source: the dads! Below are the results from this anonymous survey.* In addition to reading through these responses, be sure to check out episode 2 of the Exploring Food Allergy Families podcast, where themes from this survey are discussed. Additionally, you won't want to miss the 2-part episode where I chat openly and honestly with an experienced food allergy dad who took this survey (episodes 6 & 7). (Exploring Food Allergy Families podcast is available via all podcast apps, including Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and iHeartRadio) *2021 Update: Check out EFAF podcast episode 15 (Comparing Moms' & Dads' Experiences - Allergy Parenting Survey Review), which explores the survey results from moms who took this same survey and compares/contrasts the data from the dad survey. Question #1:Do you feel food allergy dads speak up enough about their experiences parenting a child with food allergies? 
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